I haven't participated in a Thursday Thirteen in awhile. Today my list is quotes from the quintessential, neurotic New Yorker, Woody Allen. I realize he's not everybody's favorite, but I've always enjoyed his comedies like Annie Hall, Hannah and Her Sisters and the Purple Rose of Cairo. So, here's a taste of Woody and his unique take on life, death and things in-between.
1. Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
2. His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.
3. I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
4. I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
5. I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.
6. I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.
7. The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.
8. If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative.
9. It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.
10. Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
11. Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.
12. You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
13. Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply, but not in those words.