Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Back On My Soapbox

I've written a few posts in the last few weeks about ticket prices and availability and I really thought I had gotten it out of my system. And then I see this picture. It's a photo of a NYC ticket scalper (oh, sorry, ticket broker). The stacks on his desk, as well as on all the desks behind him, are Mets tickets. And not even for the entire season; those tickets are just for April and May, a total of 26 home games. How many tickets do you think are there? I don't know, but it goes into the thousands. And this is just ONE broker; multiply that by God knows how many other brokers/scalpers that are out there.
Someone please explain to me how this is permitted? When we regular guys call or go on line to buy tickets, we are subject to a maximum # of tickets that we can purchase. It's so obvious that deals are being made behind the scenes. How is this allowed to go on? Ex NY Governor Spitzer (or, as he's known to some of the "ladies of the night," Client #9), signed a law, ending limits on how much brokers can charge for a ticket. According to #9, it would make more tickets available. It probably does, just not to the average Joe (or Kathy). And probably not to him either, after Mrs.#9 takes him to the cleaners. Hopefully, for his sake, she'll leave one tv for him, so he can watch the games, sitting at home, like the rest of us.

Monday, March 30, 2009

What's In A Name?

I've recently changed my blog name from Wanderlust to Jersey Girl, which I wanted originally, but was told it was already taken. But the other day, voila! there it was, just waiting for me. So I am now officially Jersey Girl or the blogger formerly known as Wanderlust.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Don't Peek!

Last night I was going through old pictures and things and came upon something that had me laughing hysterically to the point of tears. I've posted it below, BUT DON"T PEEK YET, not until I give you the back story.
At one of my first jobs, they decided to institute Casual Fridays. This was a relatively new concept in the business world. My company explained it as "what you would wear to an informal summer party or to stroll the boardwalk on a Saturday night." After the first few weeks, there were still some people who weren't getting it, so one Friday I was approached by Human Resources and asked if I would mind posing for a picture to illustrate the "well-dressed casual look." I agreed and a picture was taken of me and a male representing what the guys should wear. The company had a weekly newsletter and the following week, they published the picture. Ladies & gentlemen, below is an example of what was deemed "appropriate casual office dress" many moons ago. Ok, now you can peek.

My God! I look like a hooker! I remember those hot pants were orange and the top was brown with orange flowers. Notice I even have some middriff showing. It was because of fashions like this that the Sexual Harrassment policies in the workplace were instituted and I'm so glad I could contribute as an example as to why those laws were so desperately needed.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Running With Scissors

Some people think, if you never had kids, you're not entitled to have any opinions about raising them. Well, too bad! I think many kids today are over-indulged, over-scheduled and over-coddled to their future detriment. They are subject to too much fantasy and not enough reality (and I'm not talking about tv shows)! They rely on their parents to schedule their play time and expect mom or dad to provide their entertainment, parents who won't do ANYTHING or go ANYWHERE without their kids. I have a friend who admits she hasn't seen a non-kids movie in a theater for 10 years.
Well, it wasn't like that for me or my generation and, for the most part, we turned out okay.
First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they
carried us.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes.
Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paints.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.
As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.
We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.
We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but
we weren't overweight because WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into thebushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on tv, no DVDs, no surround sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no i-pods, no Internet or Internet chatrooms..........WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.
We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes. ("You'll put your eye out, kid!") 10 Bonus points if you know where that quote is from!
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them!
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! This is one of my biggest peeves - the "everybody wins" philosophy. Oh, if only that were true!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up askids, before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good.
Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it?!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Thursday Thirteen

13 Great Quotes of Yogi Berra

1. "He must have made that before he died." -- Referring to a Steve McQueen movie
2. "I want to thank you for making this day necessary." -- On Yogi Berra Appreciation Day in St. Louis in 1947
3. "I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early."
4. "You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six
5. "It was impossible to get a conversation going; everybody was talking too much."
6. "It gets late early out there." -- Referring to the bad sun conditions in left field at the stadium.
7. "If you come to a fork in the road, take it."
8. "Do you mean now?" -- When asked for the time.
9. "90% of the putts that are short don't go in."
10. "How long have you known me, Jack? And you still don't know how to spell my name." -- Upon receiving a check from Jack Buck made out to "bearer."
11. "You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."
12. "You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."
And my personal favorite:
13. "Nobody goes there anymore; it's too crowded."

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Laughter Is the Best Medicine


Humor is very subjective. Everyone has they're own idea of what's funny. If you've been reading my blog, you may have an idea of what's funny to me.
Well, today I needed a laugh. I went on You Tube and was so excited to find a clip of one of my favorite movie scenes of all time. I laughed hard when I saw it the first time and still laugh out loud every time I see it, even though I could recite the lines by heart.
I'd like to take a small survey. Please watch the clip and leave a short comment, saying whether you find this funny, or not. If you think it's not funny at all or stupid or whatever, tell me. I won't be offended. And I'm talking to you lurkers out there as well. Don't be shy. Tell me what you think.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

The Squeaky Wheel Gets The Grease.......Again!!

I'm on a roll here and I want to tell you the latest installment of Jersey Girl vs. the American banking system.
After Chase agreed to reimburse me for the fees we incurred when they stole our money from our checking account, I decided to try and get my bank to waive their fees. Saturday morning I called my local branch and spoke to the gentleman who helped us last week. (On a side note, the bank allows anyone with the right info withdraw from your account, no questions asked. But they required the form we had to complete to report the unauthorized transaction, be notarized. Huh?) I asked him, considering the circumstances, if the bank would waive the charges. Of course, he said no, it wasn't their fault and they weren't liable. I gave him my thoughts as to why I believed the bank was, at least, partially responsible. At that point, he said he could credit one of the charges, but he would have to remove our overdraft protection. What was this, Let's Make A Deal? Where's Monty Hall when you need him? I said that it seemed like I wasn't speaking to the right person, thanked him for his time and hung up.
I immediately went to the internet and found the names and email addresses of the 5 top executives of the bank, the CEO, CFO, COO, etc. I wrote to them, explaining the situation, adding that we deposit our money in their bank, believing that it's safe and secure, only to find out it's a false security.
I never heard back from anyone, but on Monday morning, our checking account showed we were credited for all the fees.
I'm beginning to enjoy fighting "the man." Maybe I'll look for a job fighting for the little guy. It's kind of fun.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Want Some Cheese With That Whine?

Ok. I admit. I'm the one whining today. It was just a bummer of a Monday.
First thing I get hit with when I got in - you have to tell the temp we're letting her go. This temp has been with us for quite awhile and was an excellent worker. Of course, she burst into tears when she heard and I had to re-assure her it had nothing to do with her work.
I deal with our company's salespeople on a daily basis. They're always promising their customers things and then come to me to try and get it for them. I had to tell one today that there was no way what they promised was going to happen. And it wasn't because I didn't want to help; I had checked with our IT department and was told it would be impossible for our system to do what they wanted. But "you have to do it; I wouldn't have gotten the order if I didn't promise them." Why don't you check with me before you go promising the world??? AARGH!!!
Then, driving home I hear an ad saying Mets single game tickets are on sale. And when I opened my email at home, there was a note from the ferry company we use now & then to go to the games, with their schedule and package prices. The season opens in 2 weeks and this is the first time in quite a few years that I don't have tickets for ANY games (can't count the game we're going to on 4/4; that's an exhibition game). It was very tempting to say "to hell with it" and get out the credit card and make some plans. But, I have to be an "adult" and keep the wallet closed for now. BUMMER!

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Living Life On Hold

Just before 5PM on Friday, the CEO of the company I work for, sent an email to every employee around the world about FY2010 budget planning. Our fiscal year begins on 7/1/09. Among the "savings opportunities" he cites is a 5%-10% reduction in all departments. I HAVE noticed the HR Director in my director's office, which is right next to mine, frequently lately.
So, now it's just a matter of waiting it out to see what happens. I'm not losing sleep over it. As mentioned in an earlier post (12/28 to be exact), I have a "Que Sera, Sera" attitude about most things. But it certainly doesn't make for a relaxed working environment.
So, the LSH & I are in a holding pattern right now - no home improvements, no vacations, just about no nothing planned until I see if I survive this first cutback. Let's just say, this is NOT how I expected life to be at this point in my life. That old saying "Man makes plans while God laughs" couldn't be truer right now.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

David Vs. Goliath - And David WON!!!

Here's the update on my battle with Chase Bank (3/14 post).
MONDAY - Supervisor Antonio got back to me to say that, even though the Authorization Dept. advised him that I DID make the authorization, Chase would re-deposit the money, but would not pay the fees we incurred. I asked to have some proof faxed to me that I did indeed authorize them and he assured me he would. Left message at end of day to say I hadn't gotten any fax yet.
TUESDAY - Called him 3 times; left messages each time saying still no money in account and still no "proof." Antonio calls back, leaves message that, unfortunately, they can't supply any proof that I authorized the withdrawal, but they still won't pay our fees. That night, I filed a formal complaint online with some Federal banking agency.
WEDNESDAY - Money shows up in account, but still no fax. Left several messages with Antonio saying money arrived, still no fax, and that I had filed the formal complaint, giving them his name and phone number.
THURSDAY - Antonio leaves message, asking how much the fees totalled. Left VM advising total.
FRIDAY - I finally get to speak with Antonio and he said that, because of the hassle I've been through, Chase WILL reimburse me as long as I can provide proof which I immediately faxed to him.
I don't have the check yet, but, if I don't get it by the end of the week, you know who will be hearing from me. Score one for the little guys!

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Thursday Thirteen


Am I being too harsh, calling these celebrities' remarks stupid? I'll let them speak for themselves and you can decide.

1."Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."
Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign.
2."Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny
like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff." Mariah Carey
3. "I loved Jordan. He was one of the greatest athletes of our time."
Mariah Carey on hearing of the death of the King of Jordan
4. "To have your niece die in your arms is the greatest gift from god"
Celine Dion-
5. “What’s Wal-Mart? Do they sell, like wall stuff?” — Paris Hilton
6. “The word ‘genius’ isn’t applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.” — Joe Theismann
7. “I never get bored, because there’s always different puzzles, I’m wearing different clothes, there’s different contestants,
there’s different prizes.” — Vanna White
8. I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada.” — Britney Spears
9. “I’ve never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don’t like eating fish. And I know that’s very popular out there in
Africa.” — Britney Spears
10. “So, where’s the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?” — Christina Aguilera
11.“I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it’s true lightness.” — Alicia Silverstone
12. “Too many OB/GYN’s aren’t able to practice their love with women all across the country.” — George W. Bush
13. "I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people."
- Dan Quayle

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Randomly Yours

I just wrote my first letter to the editor. It was a suggestion for an article. We'll see if it goes anywhere.
I've been thinking of sister blogger, Preppy in the City, all day. Her mom was having surgery today. Hope all is well.
My adorable boy, Bailey, my Old English Sheepdog, is being a pest right now. I also think he has gas.
I wish we would win the lottery. I''m sooooo tired of working.
I'm annoyed with myself. I lost 10 pounds last month when I had surgery (I don't recommend this as a way to lose weight), but I'm slowly putting it back on.
I just got a copy of the insurance bill for my 6 night stay at Hotel de la Hospital. The cost for the room only: $27,000+. And I didn't even have a view.
Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Dilbert Speaks The Truth

Below is one of my favorite, all-time Dilbert cartoons. It ran a couple of years ago; I have it posted on a corkboard I have in my office. It's funny and very true, at least where I work. Can anyone else relate?

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Chapter Two.........

of the ongoing saga of me and Chase, the big, old, mean bank.
Yesterday morning, the first time I called Chase, I was advised by the computer voice, that instead of waiting on hold, I could leave my name & phone#. I wouldn't lose my place in the queue and someone would call back within "18-29 minutes." So, I elected to do that.
Exactly 10 HOURS later, I received my callback. But wait - the best is yet to come. The computer voice told me to press one to speak to a CSR, which I did and this is what I heard: "Thank you for calling Chase. Our offices are CLOSED now. Please call back during regular office hours." How's that for adding insult to injury?
Just another item to put on my list of things that will be in my letter to the President of Chase, the NJ Consumer Agency, as well as a few other consumer and banking groups.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

I Know The Banks Need Money, But This Is Ridiculous

********************WARNING************ ********

My wonderful mortgage lender, CHASE, withdrew this month's mortgage payment from our checking account, WITHOUT AUTHORIZATION. Me, not knowing anything about it, sent my payment in. Today, I find out that we are overdrawn, we have no money in our checking account and have been charged $34 by our bank for insufficient funds. Do you realize that, if a company has your checking account #, they are able to withdraw money from your account wth no questions asked by your bank? There are no safeguards in effect to stop them. They don't have to provide anything to the bank to prove they're authorized, according to the guy I spoke with at our bank. Hey, why not? We know how ethical banks are.
I called Chase to get this straightened out. The CSR was very nice and apologized. He couldn't explain how this happened, but said he could rectify it. Which he proceeded to do, reversing the payment to be returned back to our account. Then he says that the funds will be available WEDNESDAY OR THURSDAY. Totally not acceptable. "May I please speak with your supervisor?"
Supervisor Antonio takes the call. I repeat the story, asking him how he, not only is going to fix this mess but also how will we be reimbursed for the insufficent funds fees, the late fees we're going to incur because we're going to be late paying bills because YOU CLEANED OUT MY CHECKING ACCOUNT!" And lastly, what are they going to do to repair our credit rating, after these late payments go on record? I asked to speak with HIS supervisor. But, of course, being Sat., Antonio was the only one stuck working on the weekend. He was going to ask the authorization dept. to investigate how this happened, but, in the meantime, until he can verify that we did not actually authorize this, there was nothing else he could do today. Again, the authorization dept. doesn't work on weekends. I asked him "why can't you do what I did and go on your website and see that, when you look into our account info, it plainly says we are not set up for pre-authorization. Of course, he can't accept that as proof. So, here I sit. No money, except for the $8.34 i my wallet. Had to put the grocery and prescriptions today on a credit card that just raised our interest rate 12 percentage points.
It's a good thing I planned on catching up on sleep this weekend. It's the only thing I can afford to do.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Friday Fill-Ins

And...here we go!

1. When I look to the left, I see out my kitchen window.

2. The dining room is the room that has the best view in my home.

3. Let it work because I can't go through this again.

4. Walking dogs done dirt cheap!

5. Voting is a responsibility that all qualified citizens must share.

6. If you have any chocolate, feel free to share.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to sleep, tomorrow my plans include sleep and Sunday, I want to sleep!

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Thursday Thirteen

I've been going to concerts for a looooooooong time, so I thought I'd post 13 concerts that I've attended, going waaaaaaay back.

1. The Byrds - This was my first concert. I was in junior high and convinced my oldest brother and his future wife to take me and a couple of my little girlfriends. And, to this day, he's never let me forget it!
2. Herman's Hermits - I "saw" them at a local high school. "Saw" may not be the correct word. They weren't even on a stage. They were on the floor of the basketball court with nothing between them and 100's of screaming tweens, trying to get near "Herman" aka Peter Noone. They never got through the first song. In order to save their lives, the band was rushed back into the locker room. It was pandemonium and to save me from being crushed, someone grabbed me and told me to go through these doors. And, lo & behold, there was Herman and the band. I managed to get a "'Hello luv" and a quick hug from Herman before they were rushed out to their waiting limo.
3. The Young Rascals - They were a band from North Jersey who, unfortunately, when they first started out, wore white shirts with Peter Pan collars and short pants. Thankfully they eventually dropped the "Young" from their name, as well as those ridiculous outfits. Too bad the artistic differences between Felix & Eddie,the 2 leads, broke the band up, because I really thoght they were a great band.
4. Electric Light Orchestra - Also known simply as ELO, I saw this band when they opened for Fleetwood Mac at a concert at Rutgers. They were one of the first "symphonic rock groups."
5. Fleetwood Mac - Saw them right after "Rumours," the album that made them famous. With the amazing Stevie Nicks in the lead, they were one of the biggest groups of that time. Unfortunately, the band was made up of 2 married couples who each eventually got divorced and that was that.
6. Chicago - I actually saw them when they were still known as the Chicago Transit Authority and had just released their first album. Their albums were named according to the order they were released. I think they got up to Chicago XXX.
7. Janis Joplin- Yes, she was high as a kite, drinking Jack Daniels straight out of the bottle, but she was electric.
8. Frank Sinatra - You're probably shaking your head, thinking how did he get on this list? There are just a few performers that I believe it's mandatory that you see at least once live and Frank was one of them.
9. Moody Blues - I've lost count how many times I've seen them live, with and without a symphony orchestra. What can I say? I love their music. One of the few bands whose egos didn't destroy them.
10. Styx - Another group I've seen countless times - before the first break-up, when they reconciled and I also saw Dennis DeYoung last year at the House of Blues in A.C.
11. Billy Joel & Elton John - I've seen both of them numerous times, both solo and together. 2 of the most talented men of my generation. I hope to catch them again this year when their tour comes to NYC.
12. Paul McCartney - Never got to see the Beatles, but at least I got to see my favorite Beatle in concert a few times.
13. Springsteen -Was there any question as to who I would end with. Bruce is like Sinatra; you have to see him perform live at least once. Is it a any coincidence they're both from Jersey?

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

America's Pastime May be Passed

WARNING - Today's blog is going to be the Jersey Girl ranting again about tickets and prices. So, if you don't want to hear it, please come back tomorrow when I may be in a better mood.
Mets' single game tickets for April & May are going on sale Sunday; however, as a past ticket package holder, I can buy them this week before they open the sale to the public, one of the "benefits" of being a loyal Mets fan.
So I went to the site to check it out. I selected a Saturday arbitrarily just to see what was available and requested the best available. What I got back was 2 seats for $240 EACH! Now I'll admit they were great seats. But, come on. God, add in the cost of the train and some food and you're looking at at least $600. For a game in April. Of course, there are less expensive seats. There are actually 28 different seat categories, starting at $27. (You can guess where they are.)
In the past, a few times during the season, we would splurge and buy tickets on Stubhub to have the chance to sit in some good seats. Now, those seats, buying directly from the Mets' ticket office , top off at $210. God knows what they'll charge on Stubhub.
I know I'm going to sound like my dad did when I was a kid (you younger people, don't be smug; your day will come). But there once was a time when you could take the family to see a game and not have to take out a mortgage. I'm disgusted. It's just a matter of time before team owners will impose seat license fees, following football's lead. And attending another sport will be out of reach of the average fan.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Happy 50th Birthday, Barbie

Barbara Millicent Roberts, aka Barbie, is celebrating her 50th birthday today. Barbie hasn't left her Dream House in 20 years. She wants everyone to remember her as the cute, curvaceous girl she was. But, as you can see above, one of the many paparazzi that constantly lurk outside her mansion, managed to snap this photo of the birthday girl in her backyard with his long-range camera. So, what's the consensus? Facelift? Nose job? Eye lift? As you can see, our girl has chosen not to color her gray hair, which I find amazing, considering how vain she was in her younger days. However, my question is "how did that body hold up over the years?" Notice that the photo was cropped so we can only see her face. I have to believe, remembering how built she was, that her boobs must be dragging on the ground by now.
Okay, that was mean. Especially on her birthday.
So, let's raise a glass to the birthday girl. Happy Birthday! Party Hearty!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Back To Work

Today is my last day of medical leave so it's back to the rat race tomorrow. I know I should consider myself very fortunate to have a job to return to and I really am thankful for it. But, if truth be told, if I could afford it, I would definitely retire. I'm sure you read about the 10 co-workers who won the Mega Millions jackpot last week. I believe that each of them is going to receive about $10 million and they all claim that they aren't going to quit their jobs. Wow. Those must be some jobs. I think they all work in the IT department at Chubb Insurance. How much fun could that be?
Now, don't get me wrong. I have a strong work ethic and take pride in my work. But, honestly, at this point in my life, I'm tired. This isn't what I planned. How many people, say, over 40, can say they are where (and I don't mean geographically) they thought they would be - monetarily, career-wise, relationship-wise, etc? And that the road they took to get to this point is the one they planned on taking? Not me; not by a long shot. I still subscribe to the saying "Man makes plans while God laughs."
Anyway, it's been great to have the time to blog and get to meet/ know some of my blogging friends during this time off. I'm going to continue to blog, but probably not on a daily basis (aw, I know how disappointed you are). So, boys and girls, keep those cards and letters coming in!

Friday, March 6, 2009

Fun & Frustration On Friday

The fun started for me first thing this AM. If you follow my blog, you know that I'm a HUGE Mets fan. The "official" Opening Day of their new stadium, Citifield, is 4/13, their first home game of the season. I wasn't one of the lucky people to get tickets. However, the Mets are playing an exhibition game against the Red Sox on 4/4. Tickets went on sale this AM at 10 and I was able to get 2. Haven't even told the LSH yet. I'm really looking forward to this. I plan on getting there early (just like the other 42K+ will be doing) to check things out. Woo-hoo!
I also received a lovely fruit arrangement from the gang in my department at work, saying that they miss me and can't wait to see me on Monday. The basket included pineapple dipped in chocolate. Yummy!
I went to the hospital to get some blood work done. I registered at the desk and sat down to wait to be called. I had remembered to bring my book with me, so it wasn't so bad. When I finally got called in, the technician tells me that, in order to get accurate results on one of the things the doctor requested, the blood has to be drawn first thing in the AM. It would have been nice if the doctor had told me.
I mentioned a few posts back that I got a new cellphone, one of the so-called Smartphones. I'm completely frustrated with it. First, it has a touchscreen that the salesgirl had absolutely no problem using. Me? I have to touch (actually hit) the screen over & over again to get the damn thing to respond. In addition to an instruction book, the phone came with the instructions on CD.
Now, I'm not a stupid person (you're going to have to trust me on that). So, I sit here with my laptop, watching the CD, following their instructions. And damn, it ain't happening. They'll say something like "hold down the Menu key, then hit C. This will bring u to the "whatever" screen. Well, not for me. George Carlin was famous for his "7 Words You Can't Say On TV." Well, thank God I'm not on TV because I would have been cancelled and fined heavily by the FCC. But, I will press on and I WILL prevail.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Thursday Thirteen

Gee, it's Thursday already. Where does the time go? Anyway, my TT today is 13 quotes from that late, great funnyman, George Carlin. Yes, he was irreverent, but extremely insightful. Not only did he make me laugh, he made me think. I didn't agree with his thoughts all the time, but, no matter what, I liked the way his mind worked.
If you're going to continue to read this, please remember that Mr. Carlin didn't give a rat's ass what people thought of him and so, some people may be offended by some of these quotes. My intention is not to offend, just to share the wisdom and humor of, IMHO, a comedy genius.

1. At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
2. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
3 . Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
4. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
5 . Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
6 . The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
7. You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans
8. What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?
9. The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.
10. Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
11. Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
12. Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.
13. Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

California Cows

I'm absolutely in love with the California Cows. It wasn't love at first sight. The first few ads I saw didn't really leave an impression on me. But, lately, I've seen some that just kill me. Did you know they actually hold auditions for these commercials. Here is one of my favorites:

I swear, she sounds just like the girl who does my nails.

You can see more of these on their website. They also have some very funny bloopers.

I'd like to leave you with one of my favorite CC commercials:

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

I'm Done With Winter

As I sit here, gazing out the window at all the snow (and, btw, watching baseball- Team USA vs the Yankees; a bit strange), a thought occurred to me; how come you never hear anyone say "oh, the winter went by so fast." I don't think even people who claim to like winter ever say that. Please correct if I'm wrong.
I was one of the people complaining about how the Christmas merchandise was on display in October and the Valentine's Day stuff was out the day after Christmas. However, you'll never hear me complain about how early the spring/Easter merchandise comes out. It puts a smile in my heart, knowing winter and snow will be soon behind us.

Monday, March 2, 2009


I just got a call from someone in the Mets' Ticket Development Dept (their term, not mine; don't know why they don't call it ticket sales anymore). The last couple of years, we've purchased some sort of ticket plan, but haven't done so yet for this year because I was unhappy how they have packaged the games. Before you could buy a Sat. or Sun. plan and your tickets would be for the games at home on either Sat. or Sun. Makes sense. This year, if you purchase what is being marketed as a Sat/Sun plan, you get tickets for 10 Sat/Sun games, but also 5 weekday games. It obviously has pissed off a number of fans. They could have prevented some of this negative fan reaction by marketing it as a 15 Game Plan, rather than as a Sat or Sun package.
Well, I didn't commit to anything but, maybe because Opening Day is fast approaching or I watched my first Mets game of the year yesterday or because this time last year we were down in Port St Lucie at Spring Training, I feel myself weakening. I'm going to talk with the LSH tonight, but I know he's just going to leave it up to me. I'm torn; we should be watching our pennies right now and Mets tickets aren't a necessity. But, going to a Mets game is one of my very favorite things to do. Oh, I don't know. I guess I'll sleep on it.

Snow Day

Like the rest of you living in the Northeast, the Jersey Shore got hit by this late winter storm. We got probably about 11 inches. The LSH has been out on the road plowing since 1AM this morning, making some extra $$s. Poor Bailey, our old Old English Sheepdog. The snow came up to his belly and he couldn't figure out how to do his thing out there. When he was younger, he loved the snow, romping around and snuffling his nose in it. Now it's just a hassle, much like I feel. Pretty to look at, but basically, just a pain to deal with.
I relate to what Joni Mitchell wrote about clouds in her beautiful song "Both Sides Now." I believe Judy Collins had the hit record with this, but Joni wrote it. I just substitute "snow" for "clouds.
Rows and floes of angel hair
And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons evrywhere
Ive looked at clouds that way

But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on evryone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
Ive looked at clouds from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
Its cloud illusions I recall
I really dont know clouds at all

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Lazy Sunday (I Hope)

It snowed a bit last night. Not a lot; just enough to cover the ground. The "always on the mark" meteorologists are saying we could get 5-9 inches overnight tonight OR we could get nothing at all. That's great. Cover all your bases. This way you can never be wrong.
The day has started off good. The LSH made his wonderful pancakes which I enjoyed immensely while lazily perusing the Sunday paper & doing the Jumble. My plans for the rest of the day:
* Do the breakfast dishes.
* Color my hair. (When I was younger, I colored my hair because I liked to experiment; now I color it because I have to!)
* Do some laundry.
* Get out my Snuggie and get comfortable on the couch.
* Continue my reading of "World Without End." (I'm loving it).
* MAYBE, if I'm up to it, dig out my new cellphone's manual and learn some more. I've got the basics down. I need to learn how to get on the internet and how I can get my emails.
* Not even sure what we're doing for dinner.

It's just that kind of day.
Happy Sunday!